2013

KLOMP$$

The big one

Champion

Team Brazzers

After a semi in which he coached Jamaal Charles to a 55-point week, and a championship where he overtook the Lord of Sealand, Kirill brought the title (and nothing else, as the league winnings were lost) home to Staten Island. For the love of the game.

Hardware

Season awards

Biggest blowout

My Entire Team Fucked Me 226.00 def. Team carson 101.00 (by 125.0, week 14)

Setting the table

Draft

Date: August 24, 2013
Venue: Theta Chi House
Where: Bethlehem, PA

Round 1 10 picks

1.1 Adrian Peterson Kevin McMurtrie

1.2 C.J. Spiller Seattle RB

1.3 Arian Foster Andrew D'Onofrio

1.4 Doug Martin Kevin Merry

1.5 Marshawn Lynch Matthew Valenti

1.6 Jamaal Charles Kirill Gordeitchik

1.7 LeSean McCoy Michael Amabile

1.8 Ray Rice Thomas Koslowski

1.9 Trent Richardson Billy Moran

1.10 Calvin Johnson Alexandre de La Noue

Round 2 10 picks

2.1 Alfred Morris Alexandre de La Noue

2.2 A.J. Green Billy Moran

2.3 Peyton Manning Thomas Koslowski

2.4 Stevan Ridley Michael Amabile

2.5 Aaron Rodgers Kirill Gordeitchik

2.6 Steven Jackson Matthew Valenti

2.7 Drew Brees Kevin Merry

2.8 Frank Gore Andrew D'Onofrio

2.9 Cam Newton Seattle RB

2.10 Matt Forte Kevin McMurtrie

Round 3 10 picks

3.1 Tom Brady Kevin McMurtrie

3.2 Maurice Jones-Drew Seattle RB

3.3 Brandon Marshall Andrew D'Onofrio

3.4 Vincent Jackson Kevin Merry

3.5 Jimmy Graham Matthew Valenti

3.6 Dez Bryant Kirill Gordeitchik

3.7 Randall Cobb Michael Amabile

3.8 Victor Cruz Thomas Koslowski

3.9 Chris Johnson Billy Moran

3.10 Julio Jones Alexandre de La Noue

Round 4 10 picks

4.1 Matt Ryan Alexandre de La Noue

4.2 Darren McFadden Billy Moran

4.3 Reggie Bush Thomas Koslowski

4.4 Matthew Stafford Michael Amabile

4.5 Demaryius Thomas Kirill Gordeitchik

4.6 Montee Ball Matthew Valenti

4.7 David Wilson Kevin Merry

4.8 Roddy White Andrew D'Onofrio

4.9 Andre Johnson Seattle RB

4.10 Marques Colston Kevin McMurtrie

Round 5 10 picks

5.1 Wes Welker Kevin McMurtrie

5.2 Larry Fitzgerald Seattle RB

5.3 Colin Kaepernick Andrew D'Onofrio

5.4 Reggie Wayne Kevin Merry

5.5 Eddie Lacy Matthew Valenti

5.6 DeMarco Murray Kirill Gordeitchik

5.7 Danny Amendola Michael Amabile

5.8 Anquan Boldin Thomas Koslowski

5.9 Hakeem Nicks Billy Moran

5.10 Ryan Mathews Alexandre de La Noue

Round 6 10 picks

6.1 Tony Gonzalez Alexandre de La Noue

6.2 Dwayne Bowe Billy Moran

6.3 Vernon Davis Thomas Koslowski

6.4 Jason Witten Michael Amabile

6.5 Rob Gronkowski Kirill Gordeitchik

6.6 Andrew Luck Matthew Valenti

6.7 Chris Ivory Kevin Merry

6.8 Mike Wallace Andrew D'Onofrio

6.9 James Jones Seattle RB

6.10 Darren Sproles Kevin McMurtrie

Round 7 10 picks

7.1 Antonio Brown Kevin McMurtrie

7.2 Kyle Rudolph Seattle RB

7.3 Robert Griffin III Andrew D'Onofrio

7.4 Jordy Nelson Kevin Merry

7.5 Cecil Shorts Matthew Valenti

7.6 Greg Jennings Kirill Gordeitchik

7.7 Russell Wilson Michael Amabile

7.8 Seahawks D/ST Thomas Koslowski

7.9 Lamar Miller Billy Moran

7.10 BenJarvus Green-Ellis Alexandre de La Noue

Round 8 10 picks

8.1 Torrey Smith Alexandre de La Noue

8.2 Steve Smith Billy Moran

8.3 T.Y. Hilton Thomas Koslowski

8.4 Eric Decker Michael Amabile

8.5 Steve Johnson Kirill Gordeitchik

8.6 Sidney Rice Matthew Valenti

8.7 Pierre Garcon Kevin Merry

8.8 DeSean Jackson Andrew D'Onofrio

8.9 Tony Romo Seattle RB

8.10 49ers D/ST Kevin McMurtrie

Round 9 10 picks

9.1 DeAngelo Williams Kevin McMurtrie

9.2 Texans D/ST Seattle RB

9.3 Rashard Mendenhall Andrew D'Onofrio

9.4 Owen Daniels Kevin Merry

9.5 Mike Williams Matthew Valenti

9.6 Bears D/ST Kirill Gordeitchik

9.7 Daryl Richardson Michael Amabile

9.8 Fred Jackson Thomas Koslowski

9.9 Eli Manning Billy Moran

9.10 Giovani Bernard Alexandre de La Noue

Round 10 10 picks

10.1 Tavon Austin Alexandre de La Noue

10.2 Greg Olsen Billy Moran

10.3 Santana Moss Thomas Koslowski

10.4 Mark Ingram Michael Amabile

10.5 Bernard Pierce Kirill Gordeitchik

10.6 Vick Ballard Matthew Valenti

10.7 Lance Moore Kevin Merry

10.8 Shane Vereen Andrew D'Onofrio

10.9 Isaac Redman Seattle RB

10.10 Miles Austin Kevin McMurtrie

Round 11 10 picks

11.1 Antonio Gates Kevin McMurtrie

11.2 Kenny Britt Seattle RB

11.3 Brandon Myers Andrew D'Onofrio

11.4 Patriots D/ST Kevin Merry

11.5 Josh Gordon Matthew Valenti

11.6 Ahmad Bradshaw Kirill Gordeitchik

11.7 Bengals D/ST Michael Amabile

11.8 Josh Freeman Thomas Koslowski

11.9 Vincent Brown Billy Moran

11.10 Broncos D/ST Alexandre de La Noue

Round 12 10 picks

12.1 Ben Roethlisberger Alexandre de La Noue

12.2 Michael Vick Billy Moran

12.3 Stephen Gostkowski Thomas Koslowski

12.4 Matt Bryant Michael Amabile

12.5 Jermichael Finley Kirill Gordeitchik

12.6 Chris Givens Matthew Valenti

12.7 Denarius Moore Kevin Merry

12.8 Andre Brown Andrew D'Onofrio

12.9 Jared Cook Seattle RB

12.10 Blair Walsh Kevin McMurtrie

Round 13 10 picks

13.1 Joe Flacco Kevin McMurtrie

13.2 Ronnie Hillman Seattle RB

13.3 Golden Tate Andrew D'Onofrio

13.4 Jacquizz Rodgers Kevin Merry

13.5 Rams D/ST Matthew Valenti

13.6 Justin Tucker Kirill Gordeitchik

13.7 Emmanuel Sanders Michael Amabile

13.8 Isaiah Pead Thomas Koslowski

13.9 Packers D/ST Billy Moran

13.10 Matt Prater Alexandre de La Noue

Round 14 10 picks

14.1 Martellus Bennett Alexandre de La Noue

14.2 Ryan Broyles Billy Moran

14.3 Knowshon Moreno Thomas Koslowski

14.4 Le'Veon Bell Michael Amabile

14.5 Matt Schaub Kirill Gordeitchik

14.6 Mikel Leshoure Matthew Valenti

14.7 Rueben Randle Kevin Merry

14.8 Michael Floyd Andrew D'Onofrio

14.9 Phil Dawson Seattle RB

14.10 Brandon Pettigrew Kevin McMurtrie

Round 15 10 picks

15.1 Steelers D/ST Kevin McMurtrie

15.2 Bryce Brown Seattle RB

15.3 Ravens D/ST Andrew D'Onofrio

15.4 Robbie Gould Kevin Merry

15.5 Sebastian Janikowski Matthew Valenti

15.6 Ben Tate Kirill Gordeitchik

15.7 Malcom Floyd Michael Amabile

15.8 Vikings D/ST Thomas Koslowski

15.9 Johnathan Franklin Billy Moran

15.10 Aaron Hernandez Alexandre de La Noue

Round 16 10 picks

16.1 Kendall Wright Alexandre de La Noue

16.2 Josh Brown Billy Moran

16.3 Riley Cooper Thomas Koslowski

16.4 Cowboys D/ST Michael Amabile

16.5 Plaxico Burress Kirill Gordeitchik

16.6 Justin Blackmon Matthew Valenti

16.7 EJ Manuel Kevin Merry

16.8 Randy Bullock Andrew D'Onofrio

16.9 Shonn Greene Seattle RB

16.10 Bilal Powell Kevin McMurtrie

This year’s rosters

Teams

Batman, George Clooney Version

Billy Moran

Tanking for Wiggins

Kevin Merry

Murt Top/ Kirill Bottom

Kevin McMurtrie

My Entire Team Fucked Me

10-team league

Standings

#	Team	Owner	W-L	PF	PA	Division
1st	TEAM Brazzers	Kirill Gordeitchik	11-4	1827.0	1519.0	West
2nd	I AM FAT	Matthew Valenti	8-6-1	1590.0	1569.0	West
3rd	The Real Dave Diehl	Thomas Koslowski	9-5-1	1727.0	1584.0	East
4th	Batman, George Clooney Version	Alexandre de La Noue	7-8	1612.0	1696.0	East
5th	Tanking for Wiggins	Billy Moran	9-6	1413.0	1353.0	West
6th	Murt Top/ Kirill Bottom	Kevin Merry	8-7	1465.0	1430.0	West
7th	My Entire Team Fucked Me	Kevin McMurtrie	6-9	1559.0	1465.0	West
8th	The Sameerkat	Andrew D'Onofrio	7-8	1410.0	1444.0	East
9th	Fantasy Foosball	Michael Amabile	6-9	1481.0	1649.0	East
10th	Team carson	Seattle RB	3-12	1190.0	1565.0	East