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Matthew D'Apuzzo trading card

Matthew D'Apuzzo

Nickname
Pazzo
Hometown
Scoth Plains, NJ
Favorite teams
Giants, Yankees, Devils

One Cornerment belt and one West banner. The 2023 belt is real consolation for someone who has finished top-4 multiple times but never closed the deal. Famously missed the 2026 Cornerment because his dad was retiring at some point that same year, a reason the league has, to this day, refused to accept as legitimate. We will be making fun of this excuse for the next decade.

2023 Cornerment Belt
2024 West Banner
Season history

Year by year

Career: 93-92 · 17475 career points for · 12 seasons

Year Team W-L PF KLOMP$ Cornerment Honors
2025 It's you! McCuffin! 8-7 1383.4 5th 3rd
2024 Deadeyes Shaky Hands Can't Lose 8-7 1522.3 4th 3rd
West Banner
2023 Get Him to the Grease 10-7 1655.0 2nd 1st
Cornerment Belt
2022 Pls Sir May I Have Some More? 10-6 1612.3 3rd 4th
2021 Ida Drafted Differently 7-7 1342.8 8th 3rd
2020 Return of the Hunt: Jr's Rise 6-8 1317.7 5th
2019 We're All Mad Here 5-8 1260.2 8th 4th
2018 Keenan and Kel 9-7 1449.5 5th 5th
2017 Air Force One 9-7 1550.3 7th 5th
2016 Moncreifing The Blount 8-8 1503.2 5th 4th
2015 Jonesing For A Blount 9-7 1497.8 6th 6th
2014 Dirty Dogs 4-13 1380.7 12th
Owner vs owner

Head-to-head

Matthew's full-career head-to-head record against every other KLOMP$ owner. Total: 93-92. Regular season and playoff matchups combined, sourced from every ESPN box score since 2012. Sorted by games played.

Opponent W-L-T Win % Games
Brian Wohlhieter 13-10 .565 23
Kevin Merry 11-9 .550 20
Michael Amabile 9-11 .450 20
Thomas Koslowski 8-10 .444 18
Jai Vaze 6-11 .353 17
Billy Moran 10-6 .625 16
Alexandre de La Noue 8-7 .533 15
Andrew D'Onofrio 9-3 .750 12
Eric Leyden 8-3 .727 11
Connor Marr 7-4 .636 11
Thomas Pacelle 0-10 .000 10
Kirill Gordeitchik 1-4 .200 5
Matthew Valenti 2-2 .500 4
Alex Jacob 1-1 .500 2
Jason Moody 0-1 .000 1
Cornerment partners

By his side

Every Cornerment Matthew has shown up to, and the partner he was strapped to for it. Most frequent partner: Michael Amabile (2×).